I have been on medication for anxiety and depression since my daughters died in 2007 (almost 3 yrs ago). As a teen and young adult, I was on and off meds too.
Well, a few weeks ago I ran out of meds, and no more refills. Needed a new prescription. Well, I was feeling pretty good, so I didn't bother to call. The slippery slope down was gentle. Eventually I wasn't sleeping quite as well (but of course, that is just because I am busy). I was eating more (but that was because I was busy and therefore more hungry....). I didn't notice the mood swings much.
And then about 5 days ago it all hit me like a ton of bricks. I am so tired, and moody, and crabby. And anxious, and unfocused. OK, maybe this little experiment wasn't such a good idea....It took a few days to get in touch with my doctor, but I now have a new script and will be back on medication this evening.
I am fighting myself this afternoon because I have sooooo many ideas running through my head related to our budget. I spent 45 minutes talking to G-man this afternoon, and he could barely follow what I was saying. He just handed me the pill bottle.
I am attempting to crunch numbers and I am all over the place. I start one thing....and then I get another brilliant idea and go off on a tangent. Yeah, I am getting really far. I have a ton of unfocused ideas. And they all involved various combinations of things that I am not able to sort out.
Needless to say, no big decisions will be made until I am back to myself. Meanwhile, I am going to keep trying to gather the information I need and hopefully this weekend I will be clear headed again and will be able to have a real plan.
Ugh....why did I do this to myself!!!?