Wednesday, May 12, 2010 you say something or not?

Family.  Love 'em.  Dislike 'em.  They definitely complicate some matters.  Looking for some guidance on this one, peeps.....

My mother-in-law offered at Easter (via phone...remember, she lives 400 miles away) to contribute to the kids' camp expenses for the summer.  Since she rarely sees them, it is her way of feeling "grandmotherly."  She sees her other grandkids much more often, and are always buying them stuff.  So while my kids don't get lots of "stuff," she tends to make monetary contributions to larger things.

G-man said thanks, and left it at that.  Whatever she sends, she sends.  If it is $50, or $500....we will greatly appreciate it.  That is....if she ever sends it.  Like I said, this was at Easter (5 weeks ago).  Since then, she has sent a small Easter basket for the kids, my birthday present, and my Mother's Day card.  No check.

I had to pay $956 for camp yesterday for the kids.  OUCH.  They have been going since they were 3, and it is a wonderful program, and well worth every penny (7 weeks of fieldtrips, theme days, ice cream and pizza, plus....Bossy Boy gets an aide and nurse at no additional charge).  We had money left over from the insurance check debockle that we had put aside for this expense.  But when MIL offered to pay (and G-man hinted that she hinted it would be closer to $500), we had hoped to do this

If past experience is any indication, than this is what we expect to happen: 

1)  G-man will be talking to Mom, and mention that we just signed the kids up for camp.  She will go "oh yeah, I owe you a check."  And maybe it will come now...maybe not.


2)  She will give us a check when we see her in June.


3)  She will decide that she still wants to do something for the kids, but will opt to get them more "stuff" when we are visiting, rather than help out with camp.  (less likely scenario, but has happened before).

My guess is it will be a 1/2 combo.  We struggle with separating money into allotted "pots" and not knowing if she will or won't help out is hard to budget for other stuff.  I am going on the assumption that we get zero dollars, and if we do, then great....  But given this is "Mom,"  should we ask/say something???  She is well aware that we struggle, and since the death of my father in law, she is living quite comfortably (so money isn't the issue for her).

I really know the answer....I am just curious what you all think.


  1. Wow, that is a tough call. I know I wouldn't say anything but I am a Wuss (as my wife calls me) when it comes to awkward stuff like that.

    I would probably opt for Option #1 and drop no-so subtle hints.

    Visiting from Yakezie, good luck!

  2. I would say nothing and plan for $0. Is that what you were thinking?

  3. This is urban guerrilla comedy, right? I ask because no one on the planet is smart enough to write in coherent, grammatically correct sentences yet dumb enough to really drop a grand to indulge their precious snowflakes while carrying $72,000 in debt.

  4. Well, when your kids are out of school, and you don't have anyone to watch them all summer....and you have to go to work.....then you have to find something for them to do.

    You think it is easy to find someone willing to take an Autistic child with medical problems for under $500 for 7 weeks???? And take them swimming, on field trips, and give them ice cream???

    I would love to have put that grand elsewhere. But child care is $$! I am guessing you either don't have kids, or at least have family around to help ya (our closest family member is 400 miles away!)